[VIDEO] Vulnerability in Speaking or Storytelling with Rebecca Anderson
Storytelling coach and performer Rebecca Anderson - shown here at The Moth - tells us about being vulnerable with your audience. Hint: It doesn’t mean spill your guts. And you get to control it!
“Vulnerable” is a huge buzzword for leaders and speakers.
Here’s how to do it right.
This is part 2 of a 3-part conversation.
Part 1 is on the blog. So is Part 3.
Ever since Brené Brown began promoting vulnerability as a good thing for leaders (and I’m a fan), “vulnerability” has become a huge buzzword everywhere - in storytelling, in presentations, in leadership meetings - anywhere someone needs to speak or lead.
Unfortunately, some people mistake “vulnerable” for “apologizing” or “spilling your guts.” Neither will win over the audience whether you’re telling a story or delivering a presentation.
Randy and I sat down with Pastor and Storytelling Coach Rebecca Anderson to tease out the boundaries between being vulnerable and just turning off your audience.
Listen to our conversation, and learn how to do it right.
3 Tips for Being Vulnerable in Front of An Audience
Don’t open with a caveat or something that dings your credibility. It negates your power as a speaker.
It’s a misconception that opening with a statement that lets your audience know how nervous, unprepared, or uninterested you are will win them over. Things I have actually heard speakers or storytellers say upon opening:
- “I’m so nervous! I’ve never done this before.”
- “Sarita was supposed to present this today, but she’s out sick at the last minute, so you’re stuck with me.”
- “Um, I didn’t really have time to prepare, so I’ll just give you what I’ve got.”
The thinking from those who begin with caveats is, “If I let my audience know how I feel, they’ll be on my side.”
But they would be wrong.
Sharing your true feelings, or spilling your guts in that moment, has the opposite effect. It negates the power of your speech or story. So nix nix on all the negative comments.Share your humanity, but don’t expect the audience to take care of you.
Rebecca Anderson refers to this as “structural taking care.” She contrasts opening with, “Hi, I’m really nervous to tell a story,” with sharing a story about experiencing a medical issue that illustrates “my body is falling apart.”
The first one is the storyteller (or speaker) asking the audience to take care of them; the second is the speaker sharing their humanity.
Do the second one. (When appropriate! I don’t expect all presenters to work in medical issues during a business presentation!)
Don’t do the first one.As a speaker, presenter, or storyteller, you already have the authority.
When you’re the one at the front of the room, you are a leader, where you know it or not. You’re in the position of authority as a storyteller, presenter, or speaker. Act like it.
Rebecca says, “It’s not about you getting authority from the audience; it’s you remembering you already have it.”
Want to hear more?
Where Can I Practice Storytelling? Chicago + Nationwide
Need help with your own speech, presentation, or story? Get in touch to work with me or Randy.
Rebecca Anderson performing at The Paper Machete.
“It’s not about you getting authority from the audience; it’s about you remembering you already have the authority.”
About The Author
Hi! I’m Marianna. I make public speaking and presentation skills easier for my clients. I help with everything from preparation to managing anxiety and nerves to speaking with strength and confidence. In addition to Presentation Skills workshops, I offer executive coaching and Keynote speeches. To learn more, Get in touch.
