I Get Nervous When I Speak (too): My Stand-Up Journey - Summer 2022
I approach each client and each job with empathy. Feeling nervous about public speaking is natural. Speaking to a roomful of people is daunting, no doubt.
And even though I love presenting and speaking to crowds, I still get a twinge of the nerves - all the pros do. (See: Adele, Ricky Martin, Barbra Streisand…) Nerves be damned, I love it. I call my nerves “excitement.”
When I present, I don’t get the paralysis some people do when they have to speak to a crowd.
But I’m about to.
Starting this week, I’m taking a stand-up comedy class. And I’m going to chronicle the experience here each week with personal videos, sharing my journey with you.
The very thought of performing stand-up comedy gives me equal parts joy and terror. Yes, I’m excited (stand-up is one of the few theatrical art forms I haven’t tried), but also terrified. As of this writing, I’ve told precisely 3 people that I’m doing this. (Now it’s 4, as of this weekend.)
I’m a huge fan of doing things that scare me. That’s how we grow - by taking on and overcoming challenges.
I’ve spent years acting in theater, film, and commercials. I studied Improv at Second City, IO, Annoyance and Theatresports. I’ve performed improv and sketch comedy all over Chicago.
Still. Despite what my friends think, this doesn’t mean stand-up will be easy. In fact, I think it’s harder than any of those other things. Many people think comedy is comedy - if you do improv you must be a comedian. Not.
To me, the two most difficult (and scary) things to do on stage are 1) sing and 2) stand-up comedy.
I did the singing thing in the late ‘90s in San Francisco. I took voice lessons at the Blue Bear School of Music, immediately followed by a Vocal Performance class. That class concluded with - you guessed it - a student performance.
I was easily the worst singer in the room. I heard my voice, crackly and off-key as I warbled through the Shawn Colvin version of Talking Heads’ “This Must Be the Place.”
As everyone was leaving the theater, a 30-something guy gave me a look, which I took for pity, and said, “Thank you for singing.”
I didn’t know if he meant, “Wow, you sucked so any of us can do this!” or “Man, you have guts if that’s how you sound.” Or if he was just being kind.
But I’m glad I did it. I still left that night feeling high. (I love performing more than anything, even when it’s less than optimal.)
So - here we go. No matter how hard I bomb.
Week 1: Before Class. I’m terrified.
Going into class, I had a few fears, not just the fear of getting on stage and telling jokes. I was pretty sure I would be the only middle-aged person in the room (I wasn’t), and pretty sure I’d be the only woman (I wasn’t).
It was refreshing to see that the room was not filled with 23-year-old boys wanting to be the next Adam Sandler. (Take any improv class in Chicago. I promise you, that’s the crowd.) I have nothing against 23-year-olds. I love them. I just wanted to be - let’s be honest - comfortable. Don’t we all, in strange situations?
How Class 1 Went
I really enjoyed the first class, and there was no pressure to get up and “be funny.” The classroom is set up like a mini-comedy club, including the small round tables and chairs. There’s a tiny stage up front with a mic.
This is the optimal learning situation - mimicking the actual environment. One reason we get nervous before a speech is the lack of familiarity with the environment.
We introduced ourselves, talked about our favorite comics, brainstormed subjects for comedy, and learned how to make a joke tree.
Week 1: After Class.
Feeling better, still a tad nervous.
Week 2: Feeling optimistic
I went into Week 2 feeling good, very open to the experience:
..and came out, for whatever reason, still somewhat optimistic:
Week 3: I don’t want to do this anymore.
Why I had this “onward!” attitude after week 2 befuddles me as I write this.
Honestly, in my Week 2 class, I sucked. I said a word I wasn’t supposed to, and it was crickets for 3 minutes.
Not one person laughed at anything in my joke tree, except Mike, our instructor, and I’m pretty sure it’s because he has to. In an encouraging way, I imagine. That’s what a good instructor does.
So now, a week later, we have to present our 3-minute sets. And I’m dreading it.
My trepidation of performing stand-up has grown to the levels of crippling stage fright.
I don’t feel good sharing whatever “jokes” I came up with. (Apparently no one thinks my stuff is funny.) And I am full-on planning to bail on my student show in July. (Hey, I’m not getting paid to do this.)
So…onward.
Week 3: Post-Class - It Gets Better
Hey, it’s getting better! And I’m not quitting. I’m doing my student show in July.
I did not record any videos before or after class on Week 3 because I was-in my mind- set on quitting mid-session. (Not a great look for a coach, I know, but I am doing this - among other reasons - so I can be in my clients’ shoes.)
Before my 3rd class, I hopped on a call with Randy, my stalwart friend and colleague. He was kind, loving, and supportive. He flat out said, “I will support you, no matter what you choose to do.”
And then.
He followed up with, “So…what would you tell one of your clients who told you they were going to quit, and just weren’t going to deliver their speech?”
He reminded me of multiple clients we’ve helped, like the CEO who was now sought out for speaking engagements. And the VP who has been appearing at event after event, further forwarding her org’s mission. (You can see some of these stories here.)
So I went to class. I delivered my set. (I ran over by a minute. Ugh!)
I got some laughs this time.
One of my classmates told me, “You have great stage presence!”
I felt really good after my 3-minute (really, 4-minute) set.
Will I be giving Amy Schumer a run for her money any time soon?
Hell, no.
But that was never part of the plan.
I haven’t had a creative outlet in 2+ years, and attempting stand-up was a way for me to reignite my creative spark, and to also live through what was initially a terrifying speaking experience.
I can’t wait to see how week 4 goes!
Week 4: I present a 5-minute set
I’m eager to get to class this week. I’ve worked on my 5-minute set and have tightened it down to 4.5 minutes. (Yay!)
Helping my clients prepare a presentation has been my specialty for awhile. Now, with this stand-up experience, I understand the pressure to communicate a message within a time limit moreso. I love having this perspective.
Week 4: After class - I’m really loving stand-up!
Well, that was fun!
My jokes are far better than they were in Week 2. And my biggest surprise was when I forgot a joke, realized I forgot it, then blurted out the first thing that popped into my head - and the audience was roaring. Fortunately, my phone was recording, so I knew what to keep for next week’s set.
I’m learning so much on this journey. I’m learning things that will help me make my stand-up sets effective (ie, “funny” or at least enjoyable…), and I see how it all translates to presentations. I’ll put all those lessons in a separate post.
See/hear my post-class thoughts:
I’m a professional speaker and public speaking coach. My background includes years of studying and performing improv.
Comedy, though, is a whole ‘nother animal. I’ll update my journey here, each week, through the end of July, 2022.